How I work
What I believe
I believe that we each have the potential to change. We can change the way we think, the way we react, the things we say. We can transcend our habitual fight or flight reactions and transform our defensiveness and antagonism. We can learn to approach ‘difference’ with a mindset that says ‘I wonder what’s going on there? What is it like to be that person?’ And when we fall short of this, we can repair the damage.
In short, we can liberate ourselves from our habitual ways of communicating. We can step beyond right/wrong, either/or, win/lose ways of being. We can get to a place that is true, honest and respectful; a place from which we can reach out to others with an open heart.
We can change if we care enough to do the work. We can change if we are willing to put in the time. We can change if we are willing to commit to becoming more and more aware of our reactions and learn how to self-regulate.
That’s the journey I’m on.
And over many years as a consultant/trainer in soft skills for businesses, designer and writer of learning materials and since 1997, being immersed in Nonviolent Communication, I’ve acquired skills and insights that I’d love to share with you.
What would you like to do differently?
- Build relationships free of blame, tit-for-tat retaliation and contempt, and based instead on mutual respect and consideration?
- Find the courage to tackle tricky issues?
- Stay calm in the face of other people’s emotions?
- Control your anger or frustration?
- Access your power with confidence and in a way that is respectful of other people?
- Get what you want in ways you won’t regret later?
All this – and more – can be the result of internalising the principles and ethos of Nonviolent Communication.
Who I work with
- Individuals who want to develop their relationship skills with their family, friends or colleagues
- Couples whose relationships are under stress
- Work groups who want to improve their communication and decision making skills so as to get more work done in a shorter space of time in a more satisfying way
- Everyone who accepts that the way they communicate affects their relationships … that relationships matter … are willing to work on their own reactive patterns … and who know there is no such thing as a quick fix
What I offer
- Private sessions for individuals and couples, face to face or by Skype/telephone
- Public workshops and free taster sessions
- Consultancy and tailor-made learning for work groups
- Self-study programmes
What I draw on
- Nonviolent Communication (I am a Certified Trainer of NVC)
- Compassionate Mindfulness
- Relationship system coaching skills
My commitment to you
I promise you learning experiences that:
- are enticing, relevant and useful – so that you are motivated to act on them
- encourage self-reflection – which will help you put your learning into practice
- make learning as accessible as possible – so that you can choose what, when, where and how you learn
- address issues that are important in your life – so that the learning has an immediate application
- are infused with all the presence, empathy and compassion that I can bring to bear – so that you have a safe ‘container’ in which to experiment with new ways of being.
A vision for a ‘future you’
In the words of Marianne Williamson:
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine.
Will you let me help you?